Tiny questions with quick answers - continuing thread

Exactly that! Ee by gum (or however you spell it) kinda phrase :slight_smile:

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To be honest (and admittedly I am from a younger generation), I really don’t like being referred to formally. I ask not to be called miss or ma’am specifically, and would much prefer people to just use my first name. I wouldn’t expect a nurse or cashier to use that language with me if we met on the street, so it’s not any different in their work situation.

As for ‘chi’, I tend to use it with older Welsh speakers I don’t know very well, but once I feel comfortable I’ll switch to ‘ti’. For people closer to my age, I use ‘ti’ from the off.

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I’d never thought of it that way, but that’s a very good point!

I also feel uncomfortable being referred to formally.

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In fact, when patients refer to us formally, they often try to use our job title. Unfortunately, this comes with an inherent gender bias. I am referred to as doctor (which I am definitely not, not do I wish to be) and my female colleagues are referred to as “nurse”. I always correct this assumption.

My friends who are doctors are also referred to on a gender basis: “the doctor just said” or “the lady doctor just said”. I get quite cross with that.

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It’s interesting how people use the word ‘lady’ as though they think it delegitimises what the person said, isn’t it?

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It comes from a very complex subconscious place. Almost as if it’s a surprise that they were allowed to qualify against the odds, whilst delegitimising.

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Me too, it’s always a bit unsettling to be referred to formally. It’s interesting that the generations for whom formal forms of address were normal are now the minority. Living in the South I occasionally get called ‘but’ which is taking a while to get used to.

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That’s a whole different thing! Our Alsation thought his name was Lovely for ages![quote=“Karla, post:3829, topic:3153”]
As for ‘chi’, I tend to use it with older Welsh speakers I don’t know very well
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That is exactly what I meant. If you were working in a hospital in any capacity, or in Reception at a Medical Centre, faced with a patient with lined face and grey/white hair leaning on a stick, would you address them as ‘ti’? If you would feel ‘chi’ more suitable, after “sut ga i helpu chi?”, came, “Miss Jones dw i”, surely you would call them that? mmm Should that be “Sut alla i eich helpu chi?”

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My first language neighbour, more or less the same age as me, tends to refer to me as ‘chi’ if she texts me for any reason. I’m not actually sure if she says ‘chi’ when we’re talking, though I always use ‘ti’ with her. It seems more friendly.

Her elderly mother lives with her and although she’s really lovely and friendly, I always feel I should use ‘chi’ with her to be respectful. I’ve noticed a fair bit of ‘chi’ used between the older women at Merched y Wawr, so maybe it’s hanging on with the older generation, but gradually going out of use with younger ones.

I think the woman serving in our local supermarket calls me ‘chi’ as well - possibly a respect for customers kind of thing. I’ll have to make a point of noticing next time. I don’t usually think about it!

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That was the point I was trying to make! It is generational. I was raised to use titles and, in Welsh, ‘chi’ to anyone who might possibly be older than me or more senior. Working in Research with a fair number of Americans led to pretty wide use of given names and moving up in status eventually led to me calling the Director of Research by his! Junior staff called me ‘Jackie’ (the name I was stuck with, as Jacqueline was only used by my dad when I was in deep trouble as a kid!). But outside the Labs, in the ordinary world, formality was king! People to whom you had not been formally introduced did not expect to use given names, especially if they were younger than you! It would have been unthinkable to call my mother’s friends other than Mr., Mrs. or Miss! The Minister was… well I called a lovely Minister in London and his wife by their names because we became friends, but, on Gower it was Mr. until after I became a Local Preacher! Folk in their late 70s have been raised to be polite to their elders. Folk in their 80s, 90s and centenarians are our elders!
As for Medigs, they were the most formal with surgeons insisting on their Mister to set them apart from mere physicians! That was unless dealing with the gas board as Doctor was more respected by non-medics! I am as bad. In a dispute over my gas bill I put all my letters after my name and received all subsequent bills complete with them!

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It’s not a question of being ‘polite’ though. You can be perfectly polite using ‘ti’ and a person’s first name, and you can be extremely rude to someone while using ‘chi’. It’s just that that WAS an expectation of language use that is now no longer the norm. Just as words change within languages, so does language use.

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The youngest person on the ward I work on currently is 86. Thats a ward of 22 patients. None insist on titles. Several have said “oh don’t call me Mrs…only X, Y or Z call me that”. This is so widespread in healthcare that that is why the norm has been to use first names. It’s not an age thing. The majority of people I work with are over 40 with at least 10 years experience. So it’s not a young nor aa junior thing either. It’s easy to judge from the outside, but the use of the familiar in hospital is actually from a very well meaning place to help people feel comfortable. It’s not rude.

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I think in general, the world is shifting away from the social distance of formalities. It’s generally much easier to approach people who you know you can talk to on a first name basis, and as Dee said, it’s perfectly possible to be polite and respectful while using someone’s first name. My aunt, who used to be a primary school teacher, insisted on being called Miss Sandra because she felt that using her last name would be too intimidating for five year olds, and she wanted them to feel comfortable talking to her.

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In Finland we call all our teachers and professors by their first names. I think the only time we ever used “Miss [last name]” was in second language English lessons, where I guess the teachers wanted the students to learn about English-speaking culture and so adopted the “last name only”-thing.

I’ve never been to a school where students are not allowed to use first names with teachers so I can’t really compare the two experiences, but I don’t think I would have the same connection to my teachers were I told to use last names. We can joke with them, correct them if they’re wrong, argue if we disagree about something and chat about everyday stuff with no hesitation.

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There was an Ar Llafar, on Ti and Chi. I remember him saying that in certain circumstances, the powers that be would insist on chi being used by and with particular people - shop staff being one, and army ranks being the other - not to garner respect, but to discourage familiarity. So officers, and the lowly foot soldiers would chi each other to maintain a sense of distance, and the same with a customer, and someone serving in a shop.
I think that the natural use of ti and chi comes more from a place of kindness and respect, and this other aspect of it’s use was more contrived, but I found it curious all the same. [quote=“Karla, post:3840, topic:3153”]
I think in general, the world is shifting away from the social distance of formalities
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I hope so. :relaxed:

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Quick, I hope clarification. Cannot get through Lesson 24 level 2 of the old course. Are “bod rhaid i ti” and "ti’n gorfod " interchangeable or are there subtle differences of use. The English sentences go
You have to - bod rhaid I ti
I’ve got to do - dwi’n gorfod
That he has to - e fod e’n gorfod
That you have to - bod rhaid I ti
Thanks

Counter-question: Are “I’ve got to” and “I must” interchangeable? :wink: There are (very) subtle differences, but usually they are interchangeable in such as you’d be understood either way.

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Effectively interchangeable - although there are some things you can do with one but not the other - for example, gorfod can become gorfodi - so you can gorfodi someone else to do things - but in terms of the straight match dwi’n gorfod/mae’n rhaid i mi, I can’t think of an example when I would use one but the other would be ‘wrong’…

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Is gorfod a bit more compelling? “He was pressed by the Fleet so had to be a sailor,” as opposed to, “Loving the sea and wanting to travel, he must be a sailor!” Sorry, hopeless examples, but …?

In England, that would be regarded as a very 1960s/1970s-trendy thing, and is nowadays looked down upon. It’s all uniforms, discipline, and short haircuts again…in many ways, we’ve gone backwards…and not in a good way.

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